Sort it out sooner rather than later.

When we work closely with others, sometimes our temperaments rub each other the wrong way.  A colleague will frustrate you, hurt your feelings or say something that burns your confidence.  Inevitably, you will get upset, making your relationship with that colleague feel strained and uncomfortable until you clear the air.

If someone’s behavior has hurt you emotionally, it’s important to address it sooner rather than later to maintain a positive work environment.

First, frame the conversation with a question, so the person can prepare to receive the feedback. “Hi John, do you have time to talk about something that bothered me in our meeting earlier today?”

This will signal to John that you want to provide negative feedback.  If he’s not in the right mindset to receive it, he can schedule another time when he can give you his full attention.  Otherwise, proceeding with the discussion will enable John to respond rather than react to what you have to say next.

“I brought up an idea that was important to me, but you dismissed it, and changed the topic to something else.  It might not have been your intention, but I took it personally.” 

Although it’s difficult, having a constructive conversation and closing out the issue together will clear your mind, restore your connection and put the working relationship back on track sooner rather than later.